I couldn't help to keep on thinking about life. When I decided to face the challenge of this life alone, I was frightened to think about how am I going to handle and react to the difficult circumstances that I may encounter throughout my way. There is a difference on how you face this life alone compared to with someone beside you that loves you and care about you. You will always feel secured, protected and needed. Thus, the difficult situation became easier to handle.
But for me, facing life by yourself alone is a total surrender in God's hand. Praise the Lord, I manage to go through all the difficulties in my life with the strength from above. I put my life in the words of the Twenty-third Psalm:
"The Lord is my shepherd; how can I lack anything? He gives me a resting-place where there is green pasture, leads me out to the cool water's brink, refreshed and content. As in honour pledged, by sure paths he leads me; dark be the valley about my path, hurt I fear none while thou, Lord, art with me."
I have encounter with a different kind of people along my way. All of them having their problems and trying to search something in their life. Here, I would like to share with you several kind of situation that makes us thinking the fact of life.
My friend Jack (not his real name) a 23 years old, student. He try to achieve his ambition to become a businessman someday. He go to college and paid his expenses with his own money. He even successfully manage to get some amount of money from his business to buy his dream car. But ended up with a serious relationship with a girl. After six months of their relationship, they get engaged and Jack move to his fiancee's house. Jack thought that this is what he wants without pondering all the consequences. One month after they engaged, Jack called me and told me that he want to break up with his fiancee. He said that it's complicated....I have no idea what kind of complicated he meant, but I tried to persuade him to think again before he take action. When I heard him again 2 months later, he told me that he cannot handle it anymore and Jack move back to his parent's house. He told me that it is so difficult to find a good companion in life.
Another friend of mine, Bob (not his real name) 28 years old. I can say he is in a good career with his job. He is having a 9 years relationship with his girlfriend but when they decided to get engaged, their relationship ended only one month after their engaged. After he broke up with his fiancee, he never stick to one woman. He can go out with a few women in a months, end up in bed and the next day he will assume that nothing happen. I have tried to ask him, if he found any girls that he been go out with can be his steady girlfriend. Well, surprisingly he told me that he never find any girls that can touch his heart.
My friend Jamal (not his real name) 41 years old. Have a good job to take care of his family. He have 3 children and he love his wife dearly. But ended up with divorce. He found out his wife having an affair with another man. As he trying to solve the problem, his wife take a decision to ask for divorce. Jamal have no choice but to follow his wife decision. Separated from his wife and children makes his life meaningless. He tried to be stronger and struggle everyday to face it. He try to move on and find a girlfriend to be his side and listen his problem but he couldn't find anyone that he trusted. He keep trying to have a good relationship with his ex-wife and be her good friend. But deep from his heart he is still hoping that his wife will accept him back as her husband.
These stories, are the people that struggle for life trying to find and search something in their lives. There are a lots more people that I come along with throughout my journey and I believe its happen to every human being in this world. The yearning of their heart seems endless.
I begin to wondering what is it that we wants? What I want in this life? I come across with this passage that makes me realize the meaning of life:
We humans never have enough because, with St. Therese of Lisieux, we choose ALL. And we will never rest untill we get it. We are made to seek and ache, until the heart finally finds something or someone to match the depth of it's desire, untill the heart finds food sufficient for its hunger. We name that food, that fulfillment, that goal of human desire, GOD.
